Cobb-ulously Improvised.

Anyway, back to being narcissistic (for today, at least). The members of my household, myself included, have become increasingly self-conscious due to some recently realized and undoubtedly unwanted weight gain. We are getting quite chubbalicious (chubby from delicious delicacies), if you know what I mean. Hence, we have decided to start eating healthier. Well, for the time being or however long my junk food-loving body can withstand. Seriously – I kid you not, I am currently having withdrawals.

While the silly BF has somehow gotten the idea that he can succeed in doing the “Master Cleanse” (also known as the “Beyonce diet”), the roommate and I are slightly more sane – I mean, realistic. Just to fill you in, the “Master Cleanse” is some sort of detox diet that consists of sipping on a lemonade concoction for about 10 days. Think that sounds easy?  I forgot to tell you that it’s all you are allowed to consume. Food is absolutely out of the question. This “lemonade” is composed of water, real lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper. Basically, it’s self-induced anorexia. Okay, scratch that. That’s a little extreme. However, it definitely takes an immense amount of self-discipline to successfully accomplish such a daunting task. I have not yet mastered this sense of self-discipline and don’t tell, but neither has the BF. Sorry babe, but as of right now, I don’t think either of us will be seeing those sexy Beyonce curves anytime soon.

So, as I was saying, the more sensible roommate and I plan to eat in a more thoughtful and wholesome manner. It started with this not so classic Cobb salad. I know that the traditional ingredients include iceberg lettuce, romaine, watercress mounted with artistically lined piles of avocado, blue cheese, chicken, chives, hard-boiled eggs and tomatoes, but my fridge didn’t supply me with watercress, blue cheese (oh, woe is me) nor chives. So, I was simply forced to improvise and yes, my friends, everything was still absolutely perfect. Instead of these three essential ingredients, I used fresh chopped spinach, some sort of shredded Mexican cheese blend and chopped onions, red and white (although, I don’t recommend using the red because the flavor is a little overpowering).

Not-so-Classic Cobb Salad (& Dressing)
Adapted (sort of) from Smitten Kitchen
Serves 4-6


1/2 head iceberg lettuce, cored and shredded
1/2 head romaine lettuce, chopped
1/3 bunch spinach, chopped
1/2 cup shredded cheese
4 strips bacon, roughly chopped
3 hard-boiled eggs, peeled and chopped into smaller pieces
1 large tomato, cut into smaller cubes
1 avocado, peeled and pitted and cut into smaller cubes
1/2 yellow onion, peeled and chopped into smaller cubes
1-2 boneless skinless chicken breast, cooked and cut into smaller cubes
Salt and pepper, to taste


2/3 cup canola oil
1/3 cup extra-virgin olive oil
1/3 cup balsamic or red wine vinegar
3/4 tbspn fresh lemon juice
3/4 tbspn dijon mustard
1/2 tspn Worcestershire
1/2 tspn sugar
1 clove garlic, minced
Salt and pepper, to taste


Get a (very) large bowl and mix the iceberg, romaine and spinach.
Arrange the cheese, bacon, eggs, tomatoes, chicken, onion and avocado in neat rows.
Mix all dressing ingredients in a blender and purée to make a smooth dressing.
Season with salt and pepper and drizzle with dressing.
Serve and Enjoy!

Despite the pangs of “hunger” I occasionally (eh hem) have from this self-induced junk food starvation, I found this salad to be quite the pleasant and filling diversion. Hopefully, this salad makes you feel as good as it honestly made me feel. It was fun to make, pretty to look at and most importantly healthy to eat.


  1. Randy

    I have browsed every word you have printed here. It gives me a good perspective in a lot of things now. I’m positive it can do the same for your audience as well.

  2. Trackback: Mark M

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